VGH again and again and again

Hello there! Waaah! I hate myself. I promised I would update this blog daily but unfortunately, I can't resist the charm of facebook, twitter and my bed. Haha! Well, good thing...there is what we call "never ending square one" so here I am updating my blogs and cramming as if I have a major exam tonight.

Anyways, I really cant do so much about my laziness in updating my blogs. I guess its a disease that is hard to cure. But I still hope I could do better this time.

Well, what happened yesterday...hmmm. Ah, I wasn't able to sleep well yesterday because the owner of the house had some major renovation done on the unit next to us. The sound of the hammer pounding into the roof gives me this uneasy feeling. That prompted me to listen to my cellphone's playlists which helped me get that precious sleep. Woke up at around 5:30 pm  and hurriedly went to the office so I can pick the best seat. When I got to the office, I am still sleepy. Waaah! Good thing we were VGHed at around 12 MN. Only four hours of work, goodluck on payday. Well, in as much as I wanted to stay as it is almost 20 minutes avail...I can't. The call of VGH is so irresistable...I just hope I don't have so many payables this month. Thank you for this day...Amen.

My Hubby's Job Application

Today my hubby will try to find his luck by applying as a clerk in a nearby City Hall. His mom, who used to work in there will accompany him and recommend him to her old boss. My hubby who lost his job three years ago (because of me) will again try to prove himself in the workforce. I know he does have a potential of being a good public servant. He is an honest man. I have never seen him doing anything that would endanger his employment to whatever company he is with. Rarely would you see an employee who would do almost anything to secure his job. He've got so many awards for Best Attendance on his old employers which only proves that he is treating his job seriously. I often wonder what his life would have been if we never met. Maybe he is now a successful employee securing a permanent job. I know I stole three years of his life when I asked him to stop working and just take care of me...so now, though my heart is broken to let him go out without me...I need to. Yeah, you read it right. I think I have some sort of psychological problem. I don't want to be alone in the house, any house. It's not that I fear my life or anything like that, I just don't like the feeling of not being with a person...by being all by myself. I know I need to overcome such fear so I am making this first step. I just hope Jojo makes it to this job and I hope he comes home before 12 NN. Haha!

No to Too Much Worrying...

It's been a hard day for me. Last night, I started feeling so lonely. I feel as if there is no more hope for my life. I feel as if my life is a never ending square one. I don't think my life is going anywhere. I shared this burden of mine to my hubby and he is quite worried about me. I know, I am the one who didn't permit him to work because I always want him to be with me all the time but I guess that same childish attitude of mine is the same reason why our life is stagnant. I feel as if I am running out of time. At the age of 31, I am still single. Though I have a live in partner, it's still very different from having a husband. Secondly, I still don't have any investment in life whether it be a property or a business I could call my own. Most of the girls my age already are living their lives abundantly while here I am, with merely P30000 left in my atm account. As of this age, I should already have a title, a manager or at least a supervisor but here I am, I still hold the same position I've had  years ago. Lastly, most of my previous classmates already have their own child...and here I am, still thinking if I could handle such responsibility. I know I should not compare my situation with other people but I also know that it is already high time for me to plan for my future. I cried it out to God, asking for His help for I cannot handle this things all by myself. I need his guidance. I poured out my feelings to him and asked Him to drive the wheel of my life. Lord I offer to you my life. I hope I could please you with it.Amen.

Don't Procrastinate

Yesterday was the 2nd part of my restday! The day before that, me, mom and my hubby went to SM Northd Edsa because I would need to treat them for lunch as my sister directed. My sister gave me P3,000 as a birthday gift. I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw her text message. So we hurriedly went to SM and headed for Landmark as well. Mom will buy me a blouse in exchange for the blouse she borrowed from me. She doesn't want to give it back to me anymore since she already made some alterations on it. I saw a nice blouse and we purchased two identical design but with different colors.I also purchased a nice white sandals which perfectly suit my white shorts. I love it!

We went to Waltermart last night. The first part of the day was spent in front of the tv while watching TLC. We went to Munoz to do our weekly shopping. Nothing much happened...but I've realized something very important that day... That I need to do the things I plan, without any excuses. My life will go nowhere if I would not do what I have planned. I need to DO everything I intend to do NOW. I need not procrastinate anymore because the more I postpone a certain task, the greater the chance I won't be able to do it at all. I hope and pray I would be able to succeed in this life and I pray that God would be bless on how I live it. Amen..

I Hate My Attitude

I promised myself to religiously post how my day went on this blog and that promise again went to trash. I hate myself because no plan of mine ever materialize especially when it comes to my finances and to my blogging career. It's been almost one month since I last posted something in here and I want to cry. Waaah! How can I be able to force myself to stick with what I planned to do. So many things are running into my mind that this simple task of updating my blogs is such a pain in the ass. I pray that I would be able to have a clear mind on what I really want to do instead of going with the flow of my life. I need to have a GOAL... and I need to do everything to attain that goal. I want motivation. I guess I lack that. Lord lead me to the right path. Amen.

Confused and Tired

Today is my restday, well...restday in the real sense of the word. I literally didn't go out of the house for 24 hours! I just stayed at home and watched tv the whole time. Maybe that is the reason why lately, I really don't have the energy to do anything. I feel bored even though I've got money to spend. I guess maybe lack of physical activity is to blame. I rarely go out and would rather stay at home and sleep than to go out, jogging or malling. I don't want this to continue... I will definitely find a way to get back my passion to life. Maybe jogging or going back to the gym would do the trick... or better yet, going back to Church would also revive back my happiness. I've been out of the Church for almost six long years, and last night, I had a dream and a realization...that we are already living in the end times. A lot of war, climate change, natural disasters, society approving gay and lesbian relationships, greed, false religion - this are all signs that the end is near. A realization also came to me - I really don't need a lot of money...I just need my loved ones to be in perfect health...that's all I want. That is the same reason why I am halfhearted about my decision to allow Jojo to work abroad. I still am thinking hard about it because if it would only take him about two to three years abroad...I might agree on it. I understand that Jojo also needs to help his parents financially, how can he do that if he can't find a job locally? Lord, help me decide. Lead the way Lord, you are the only one who know's what's best for us. Amen.

The Rite Day

Would you believe, I've been without internet service for about four days now? We already have the money to pay for it but are too lazy to go to Bayad Center for payment. We thought we can still pay it next week without our service being interrupted but we were wrong. So we immediately paid it at Waltermart Bayad Center yesterday and since our much awaited movie of Anthony Hopkins "The Rite" is also now showing, I've decided to treat my hubby to the movie house. It's cheaper in here and much cozier. It only costs P260 for both of us. Upon coming in to the theater, I though we were the only ones inside. A sudden fear enveloped me as we will be watching a movie about exorcism and nobody is around. Good thing, I heard someone cough which means we are not alone. The movie is so scary especially when the girl who was possessed screamed! Went home at around 8 pm. Watched programs of Nat Geo and Discovery Channel. Very entertaining! I'm so happy we already had our cable installed. No more boring nights!